The Father's Forgiveness Container

Forgiveness is one of those benefits that we quickly receive but are often hesitant to fully release to others. It's the foundational premise behind the entire bible, from Genesis to Revelation. If there is no need for it, there's no need for a savior and thus, no need to strive toward holiness. But there is a need for forgiveness. Every human being has the capability of doing wrong and that wrong is contrary to holiness. It's sin to put a biblical term on it. So to counteract our natural inclination to do as we please(sin)...forgiveness must be made available in order to fulfill mankind's original design.

I'll be completely honest here, I struggle with forgiving people. I tend to hold grudges, and define people by what they do to wrong me. If I'm not careful they'll always be guilty in my book. There's a problem with this. Like I said, forgiveness is the headliner of the show called the bible, so for me not to forgive creates a contradiction. It's commanded of me and you if your a christian.

Since it's pretty obvious if you've read scripture at any length, that this is a command,
I think it's more beneficial for us to understand the impact of un-forgiveness instead.
That's really the issue. Isn't it?

Typically, no one who has committed a crime or offense, will say they don't want to be forgiven or that forgiveness in general is unnecessary. We all want forgiveness. Even if it's only from our moms for snagging that extra cookie from the cookie jar! We need it.

Here are a few things I learned in looking to understand un-forgiveness.

By withholding forgiveness we are inherently saying the following 3 things (at least):

1. We deserve the forgiveness of the cross...MORE than those that offend us.
   
     I mean, we wouldn't dare ask God, who we've offended, to NOT forgive us, would we. At least 9 times the bible tells us to love our neighbor as ourself, verbatim. So if we want forgiveness for ourselves, we've got to want it for our neighbor, even, when they've done us wrong...

 The next thing we say by withholding forgiveness would then be:

2. We don't want to be forgiven

    

 Matthew 6:14-15 says "For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."

   

    This was after the Lord's Prayer teaching, Jesus gave his followers a model to pray, an outline that they could use in their regular communications with the Father... and from it the ONLY thing he emphasized was forgiveness.  See also Mark 11:25-26 and Luke 6:37-38.

 

3. Lastly, in our un-forgiveness  toward others, we're asking God not to forgive them either

   

    Again the Lord's model prayer says in

    Matthew 6:10 "your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven...

 

In other words do here what is done there. Now link that with the principle in

 

Matthew 18:18 that says"Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven." 

 

This does NOT mean that people can't be saved unless you or I approve...I'm not implying that we have any power over salvation at all. That's laughable!

 

    I also realize this passage in context is about the steps to take to deal with a fellow believer living in sin. But look at it this way, sin is an offense, offenses are either forgiven or not (which is the ultimate desire of this process, to restore relationship with one another), and v.17 ends with if your brother won't reconcile, let him be like a 'heathen or tax collector' to you. But what does that really mean? Does it mean you can write him off without feeling guilty? Maybe. But, remember... Jesus? He ate with & mingled with such sinners ALL the time. We, ourselves would have fallen into the heathen category at one point and maybe we still do from time to time. So maybe, maybe, this text isn't giving us a right to break ties rather than a directive to look at our 'brother' as one we can spend intentional time with in an effort to win them back to the Lord... Maybe. So the principle of this binding & loosing in reference to forgiveness is saying that if we restrict the forgiving work of the cross on earth, we restrict the work of the resurrected Christ from heaven.

 

In Summary

 

If you want something... give that very thing away. Just as the following verse implicates.  

Matthew 7:12- "So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you...

 

An Exercise in Forgiveness

• Make yourself a "one way in" style box, tape it, glue it, nail it...in the end, you want to only be able to get a small piece of paper inside of it and for it to be difficult to get anything out of it. We'll call it, God's Forgiveness Container.
• On small pieces of paper or index cards, write down the names of people that you need to forgive. Then on the back of those papers, write your own name as well. 
• Fold them as small as possible and place all cards into your 'impenetrable' container.(the reason for the many folds is that it takes effort to actually forgive someone)
• Pray and ask God to help you truly forgive those people. As often as needed.
• Keep this container in a visible location and pray often, multiple times daily if needed, for those individuals including yourself, that your relationships would be restored.
• You can make this a family practice(:

Now, since we are not God we can retract our vow of forgiveness. Thus the "one way in box". In order for you to retrieve your forgiveness, it will take a conscious decision & intentional effort to get back into that box. Further, it's God's container and since we all fall short and need forgiveness(if only from God), you're in there too. So you can un-forgive those people who's names you put in, but remember you wrote your name on the back... so you'll have to un-forgive yourself in the process!

 

This is only a demonstration and the real work can only take place in your heart, between you and the Holy Spirit. However, we all know that a good visual can change everything. I believe that seeing this container, placing yourself in the same position as your offenders and spending diligent time in prayer will advance your aptitude towards forgiveness. Making it more enticing than ever to fully... release. After all, the true impact of un-forgiveness rests upon the the one who's un-willing to forgive... That doesn't have to be you, it doesn't have to be me either.

 

Hopefully this helps the growth within, come out

 

Rodney

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